Monday, August 16, 2010

It's Been a Long Time...........

........since I blogged.

The last time I was here, mum was in hospital, wasn't she. She spent some five months there in total, before moving across to Malven to live in a wonderful nursing home - which really did become her home - for which I will be forever grateful.

Some of you may remember this blog post.

The last eleven months have been the hardest of my life. However, knowing that mum has been so well cared for and loved in her final few months has been of great comfort. And I've been able to see her almost every single day which has been just wonderful. It's not been easy for her, she had yet another heart attack followed by more episodes of chest pain and emergency admissions, and her health gradually declined until she became so very tired.

She was still mum though. She may not have known quite who I was (I was most often referred to as Betsy) but she knew that she knew me, and that was enough.

Mum finally passed away, very peacefully, on July 31st, aged 92. Her funeral is tomorrow. I haven't even begun to think about how much I am going to miss her.

I've missed just one day at work. People ask how I am and I say "I'm fine, thank you", when all I really want to do is curl up somewhere and shut out the world.

I have absolutely no idea how I am going to get through tomorrow.

10 comments:

RooKnits said...

Sending you a big hug Joy.

pictish said...

Sending lots and lots of love Joy {{HUGS}}

Carrie (Crochet-y-Knitter) said...

Sending you hugs to get through the day, it will be a celebration of your wonderful Mum's life.

fibreclaireUK said...

Sending love and hugs XXX

Linda said...

Oh gosh, it will be the hardest day but thing of your wonderful Mum and all those happy times whith her. Hugs from me. x

Auntie Noo said...

You'll get through tomorrow the same way you have got through the last years - with strength and dignity - that you got from your Mum. She's not tired any more, no pain, and she knows exactly who you are. I can't think of a better reason to celebrate her amazing life. (and also 'cos I share her birthday! ;) )

ruthcrafts said...

I'm so sorry. Sending you love and hugs xx

Barb Szabrowicz said...

Hugs

kathryn said...

Sending love and hugs and Noo couldn't have put it better.

missmalice said...

remembering all the love gives you strength somehow to carry the grief. sending you much love and big hugs.